Sunday, June 25, 2006

Meme -- Fake Past

I am not a meme person, but when I saw this over at Tit's List, I thought it was hilarious and would give it a try. So, all you creative people out there, refresh my memory on some things we did in the past. My mind is a little hazy right now and need all the help you can give me.

If you read this, please post a comment with a COMPLETELY MADE UP AND FICTIONAL memory of you and me.

It can be anything you want - good or bad - BUT IT HAS TO BE FAKE.

When you're finished, post this little paragraph on your blog and be surprised (or mortified) about what people DON'T ACTUALLY remember about you.


Cate said...

Remember that time when we were going to the Stones concert and stopped at the gas station to get some gas? And remember how the guy wearing a trench coat came over and asked you if you needed any Tylenol and he pulled open his jacket to display pockets full of pharmeceuticals? Remember how you examined the bottles and remarked on how much you love NyQuil? And remember how you told him that all you had was your Mastercard, and he snapped his fingers and said, "Damn, I left my credit card machine at home."

Wasn't that funny? Do you remember that?

Nah, neither do I!

Dragonfly said...

I still think about the day I met you. It was a day that changed my life forever. I was walking naked down the street convinced it was merely a dream where people were staring at my nudity, completely unaware I was actually walking naked down a public street, when I literally bumped into you coming out of the public library. Obviously you were having the same "dream" I was and we both rubbed our sore naked bumped parts, laughing at ourselves as realization suddenly hit us both. Oh, did we laugh. Then you lent me your library bag so I could cover my parts and you placed your copy of Harry Potter over your parts and we walked together down the street, together.

Kate said...

Oh my! Lou! The pilot from Bali! I had totally forgotten about going there! It's so great to hear from you!

I always meant to thank you for taking that detour to Kuala Lumpur for me. It was one of the kindest things anyone has ever done for me, being a total stranger. I don't know why I had such a fear of flying -- I normally love it! But stopping so I could get off the plane, so close to our destination, even, was really great of you.

I did eventually find a pony, but it turned out being too expensive to fly back. Oh well, right?

So anyway, I hope you're doing great! Do you still fly that same route?

Deb R said...

Hey, Lou, remember that time we went to the Empire State Building and we rewired all the elevators so that the open buttons closed the doors and the closed buttons opened the doors and pushing any number took you to a floor five stories away from where you wanted to go?

And then we sat cross-legged in the lobby, passing that bottle in the brown paper bag back and forth, laughing at the tourists getting on the elevators and taking polaroid pics of the freaked-out faces on the ones getting off.

Yeah, man, that was fun! I'm up for parole next year, how about you?

melanie said...

Remember that time when we were kids and we were at the beach building sand castles? Well, yours were more like sand sky scrapers -- they were taller than I was and so detailed and the coolest thing I had ever seen made out of sand. Then that jerk came by and pushed it down and stepped on it and you and me tackled him and buried him in sand up to his neck. Then we left and went got ice cream.

Lou said...

Thanks to everyone who participated and responded. It was fun reading everyone's memories of our past together.

Andrea said...

Remember that time when we met Tommy Lee in Las Vegas? He was all drunk and driving that Ford Taurus, he said it was the best rental car deal around. He took us from one bar to another all night long regaling us with his tales of hairspray, blow jobs and life in the fast lane. That was a wild night!

Shout at the Devil!

Anonymous said...

I will never forgive you for that time, I think it was six or seven years ago, when we were just standing on the street corner, passing the time, and this car pulls up in front of us. Three blondes and a redhead, all of them drop dead gorgeous, ask us if we want to have a good time together. And you said no. And to this day, you haven't given me a good answer why.

- Josh (

tits mcgee said...

Personally, I'll never forget the time I watched you bawl like a little girl as the bailiff dragged you out of the courtroom and off to the county jail. Your skin got all blotchy and you kept calling, "Why, Tits, why?!" Oh, your ex-wives and I laughed about that for days.

Good luck with Sxy12yrold! Just bear in mind that the odds are pretty good she's a 42-year old cop named Bub just setting you up for a bust, so if you're not interested in more time in the can, you may want to rethink that meeting with her.

Margaret said...

It was that summer in 1989 when we took a day trip to the beach to go swimming when you were stung by that terrible jelly fish on your ankle. You were in so much pain and I knew the only way to make it better was to pee on your foot. But I couldn't, because I already did when we were swimming in the ocean.

I know, big YUCK! But that may have been what aggitated that swarm of Jellies over to you in the first place. I'm sooo sorry about that.

I will never forget how difficult it was to get the attention of the tourists walking by to help you out! Once I told them they needed to pee on you - they ran away!! I think they were afraid we were making some sort of "funny hidden video" show or something.

Thank heavens that old hairy woman walked by when she did, huh? Gosh that was so gross.